Tony Stark Doesn't Like To Be Handed Things
by Laughing.Thalia
Summary: That's a fact, but why? Natasha is determined to find out why. With JARVIS' help prying into Tony's life should be a breeze especially with THE Black Widow along with Clint, Bruce and Steve helping put, but when Iron Man finds out, can Stark ever trust the Avengers again? The first (And only) instalment in 'The Avengers Don't ' Series
1. How Convenient!

**A/N: So Hiya... Follow, Fovourite and Review! The video JARVIS shows them is in **_Italics_**and that's basically all you need to know.**

The Avengers were quite familiar with the fact that Tony Stark didn't like being handed things, they all thought it was just him being arrogant, narcissistic and annoying. He let them think that because it was less embarrassing then the truth.

He was deeply engrossed in a science related conversation with Bruce when Natasha put her scheme into action. The other Avengers excluding Thor who was still on Asgard were sitting on a sofa watching Batman The Dark Knight Returns. Natasha walked past Tony oozing casualness which should have been an alarm but Widow knew how to use your subconscious against you and Tony didn't notice as she handed him a metal sphere "Here." She said and Tony took it not realising until about three seconds later, he then yelped and promptly dropped the item as if it were a hot potato while checking his hand over.

"What the heck Natasha!" Tony seemed outraged

"What the heck me? What the heck yourself! What kind of reaction was that?!" Natasha replied slightly worried for the Man of Iron but her expression stayed passive if not a little pissed

"You know I don't like being handed things!" Tony yelled back

"Tony," Natasha went steely calm and professional "That was a lot more then not liking it. It was if you thought it would explode in your face or something."

Tony looked away but mumbled "Knowing you I'm surprised it didn't."

"Oh my god, Tony, you thought it was going to explode in your face." Natasha was shocked at this revelation

"God Natasha! Do you always have to pry into everything! You walk in here with your fake ID and SHIELD skills and act like you're doing the world a great service by keeping the unpredictable Ironman in check but you seem to be forgetting that there are bigger threats out there! In fact shouldn't you be destroying one of those threats right now, you may be an Avenger but you're still a SHIELD agent! Why don't you just leave my life to me and go get a life of your own instead of pretending to be someone else!" He stormed off to the lab and left the Avengers in shock, Tony never snapped.

Clint was the first to talk "Okay what just happened?"

"Natasha I don't think you should have done that he obviously doesn't like being handed things and it seems to be more than Tony being Tony." Steve chastised

Natasha was about to answer when Bruce interrupted "Steve Tony has some sort of mental tick but from what SHIELD knows about him, he didn't have it as a child."

Clint continued "So what happened?"

"That's what I'm trying to find out." Was Widow's only answer "From my time undercover I picked up that Tony accepts stuff from Pepper and Rhodey and I think he even took something from Stane once but he looked like he regretted it immediately."

"So it's a trust thing?" asked Bruce

"Paranoia?" guessed Steve

"But paranoia of what?" questioned Clint

"Tony's a Stark. As a kid multiple attempts to take his life went down before he even turned 10 after that the records at SHIELD are black. Tony or Howard must have wiped them."

"So people have probably handed bombs and stuff to Tony." Concluded Clint

"And the way he checked his hands, acid attacks?" added Bruce

"It would seem we figured out the mystery that is Tony Stark!" Natasha looked happy at this small victory although SHIELD had been trying to get the dirt on Stark for decades so it was a pretty big victory

"Not even close but congratulations." The cool British voice that was JARVIS said down from the ceiling

Bruce's head snapped up "I will never get used to that." He mumbled before asking "J what do you mean not even close?"

"Sir isn't a puzzle that you can simply solve, he is more like a video game you have to unlock the levels and when you think you've finally finished it, it restarts and all data is restarted. You Agent Romanoff have passed Level one."

Okay small victory after all. She sighed and looked at the other three men gathered in the room. Bruce frowned and looked at Natasha "You're not going to tell Fury are you?"

"Well protocol dictates that I should..." She looked at their horrified faces "But if Stark's issues are trust related I can't be running my mouth to Fury." She wouldn't tell Fury not yet anyway. As long as it didn't affect missions

"Agent Romanoff, Barton, Captain Rogers and Dr Banner I have a series of clips from all the times Tony has been handed stuff with disastrous results. Would you like me to play them?"

They exchanged looks until Clint answered "Play it J."

_Young Anthony Stark, no older than 6 years old was dressed in a little tux and had ladies swooning over his cuteness at Stark Industries annual Christmas party the room was nicely decorated with banners and tinsel but it wasn't gaudy. I say room when I mean hall. A man who blended into his surroundings as well as a chameleon slipped through the swarm of ladies and separated Tony from them he crouched down so he was Level with his face "Hey Anthony! Do you like tech puzzles?"_

"_Of course I do! I'm a Stark!" It sounded slightly rehearsed but was said with gusto_

"_Great because I need a Stark to help me figure this out." He brought out a black metal cube and handed it to Tony_

_While Young Tony was studying the contraption he backed away and disappeared. The cube started beeping and Tony held it to his ear frowning suddenly a security guard yelled "EVERYBODY GET DOWN!" a wave of panic swept the crowd as they ducked for cover the guard grabbed the cube from Tony and threw it out the window, smashing it in the process. Five seconds later it exploded mid air. Tony was the only person standing besides the guard and he was staring at the window in shock, he had almost been killed._

_Another clip showed Tony age 10 he was at school in the cafeteria, he was sitting alone and looked thoroughly depressed which surprised the Avengers, seeing as Stark was such a party boy. He was picking at his food but wasn't actually eating it when a boy maybe a year older than him sat down. Tony looked up shocked and said awkwardly "uuuh... hi Justin."_

"_Hey Stark." The boy beamed back "I thought you'd want a drink so I got you some apple juice." He held up a juice box_

"_Really?" the boy nodded "wow, thanks." Tony took the juice box and opened it with the straw, Justin leaned backwards slightly and watched as the box exploded and covered Tony in custard. The whole cafeteria was laughing and a few people had it on video the entire school had seen it within the day._

_Justin spat "You stuck up prat! I bet you don't even know what it's like to go without something! All you have to do is ask and someone buys it! You think you're better than us because your rich and smart well your not! So what are you?"_

_Tony blinked "Genius, Billionaire, Heart Breaker, Funds Raiser. I'm a Stark"_

The Avengers realised that that was the first draft of Genius Billionaire, Playboy, Philanthropist the well known line and basically his catchphrase. Natasha gasped everyone gave her a questioning look "Whenever Tony says that he isn't being arrogant he's using it as a shield he can hide behind, to protect himself from things he doesn't want to hear."

Steve's eyes widened "But he said that to me..." Steve felt terrible "Oh God!"

"JARVIS just play it." Clint couldn't deal with an angsty cap

_Justin sneered at him "Like anyone could ever be your friend nerd!"_

_A few other voices chanted "Dork!"_

"_Geek."_

"_Weirdo!"_

"_Loner! Nobody likes you just go home!" _

"_Anthony going to cry? Go cry to your mommy!"_

"_You're such a freak not even your father's money could buy you friends!"_

"_Are you gonna get your daddy to come deal with us now?" a boy mocked_

_Some girl with a shrill voice shrieked "Please his father likes him about as much as we do!"_

_Justin leaned into Tony and hissed "Not even your own father likes you Stark! How does that feel?"_

_So far Tony had been completely passive as if he were used to it but that last one seemed to send him over the edge, he lashed out at Justin and punched him in the face. When two boys rushed him he kicked one boy in the groin while punching the other in the stomach he then stormed out of the hall covered in custard and seething with anger._

_As soon as Tony was away from everyone he ran into the janitor's closet sat down and cried, he stayed like that until the janitor came in. The janitor his name tag read Scruffy took one look at Tony and swiftly shut the door behind him "What happened this time Tony? Alex Mcgory? Dylan Williams? Who was it this time?"_

"_Justin Hammer. Somehow rigged a juice box to explode custard all over me. Then they jabbed at my father so I punched him right in his stupid face!"_

Natasha screeched "_THE_ Justin Hammer!"

"You mean from Hammer tech?!" yelled Clint

"They went to school together?" asked Steve

"It would explain why Tony hates him so much."

_The next clip was Tony when he was 15 he was with Rhodey and another guy who's badge read Steve Roger (Which was suspiciously close to Steve Rogers) Tony seemed to be meeting Steve for the first time because he said "So... Your name is Steve Roger?"_

"_Yeah, my parents are big fans of Captain America and with our surnames being so close it was inevitable." The three boys laughed at his unfortunate name_

_A woman wearing gloves who appeared to be from the Air Force walked up to them "We need a brain to check the jet."_

_Tony smirked "Well that's me I better go guys."_

"_Stark here's the information." She gave him a folder her gloves not being affected but as soon as the folder was in his hand Tony yelled and his eyes widened flashing with pain_

_Rhodey and Roger raced over "Tony!" they yelled By then Tony had dropped the folder and was staring at his hands in horror as the corrosive acid the folder had been coated in ate away at the flesh on his hands Rhodey grabbed him and started pushing him towards a fountain "Come on Tony! Move!" thankfully they washed off the acid in time and Tony's hands healed, the 'Air Cadet' was imprisoned for the acid attack and Tony never took anything from someone wearing gloves._

"I will now show you the clip when Tony finally stopped accepting things from people. Although there are about 30 other occasions when he does before this clip."

_Tony is about 21, just after his parents died he was in some sort of funeral arranging place with Mr Stane and the woman serving them, a blond, placed a form in front of them, she held out a pen and used it to point "Mr Stark just sign here, here and here." _

_She held out the pen to him and Tony reached out to take it but then recoiled he stared at his hand for a second before patting all his pockets in search for a pen "uum you know what I think I have my own pen."_

"_But Mr Stark there's a pen right-" The blonde woman started still holding out the pen_

"_It's okay I got it." Tony pulled out a fancy black pen and then saw the weird look he was getting "It was my fathers and this is his funeral, it felt right to use his pen." He was lying through his teeth but the woman bought it. He signed the document and the screen went blank._

"Wow." Was all Bruce could say

"We learnt a lot about Tony." Said Clint

"Yeah like Tony was a social outcast in high school who's father didn't like him publically enough so that his school knew but hid it well enough so that no one else knew and he went to school with Justin hammer!" Natasha processed the information

"He has major trust issues and he says 'Genius, Billionaire, Playboy, Philanthropist' when he's upset but doesn't want to show it!" Steve was still caught up in that

"Actually." Tony's voice came from behind them and their heads snapped around "I say it when someone questions me or pushes my insecurities."

Clint yelped "Tony! We-"

"Save it Clint I know what you've been doing." He then turned and glared at one of JARVIS' cameras "Watching footage that I encrypted and then deleted and then encrypted the deleted file. So JARVIS how did they view this footage?"

"You never deleted them off my original server only on my updated one." Was JARVIS' reply

"But I shouldn't have to! I synced them!"

"There was an error Sir."

"Well that's convenient." Grumbled Tony

**A/N: I'm not good with ending clearly during chapters so yh follow this story or me to see the second chapter!**

**Disclaimer: Marvel owns all!**


	2. Stark Difference

**A/N: I'm listening to Fall Out Boy as I write this so yeah, I referenced it briefly in passing.**

"You know I don't appreciate you guys snooping while I'm not around."

Steve was the first to reply "Tony we're sorry but if your inability to take items from us affects a mission what are we supposed to do? You're a liability Tony, a hazard. If you don't get it in check I'm shutting you down."

Tony looked crazy mad but steely calm at the same time, like the businessman he was. "_You_ will shut me down?" He took a step towards Captain America "I know you don't know me very well Capsicle but I won't let you shut me down. No one shuts me down, I am Iron Man and more importantly I'm Tony Stark. Genius Playboy Billionaire Philanthropist and I do what I want."

Bruce looked torn but he (as always) had to be the voice of reason before this _civilised_ conversation turned into a full blown war between Ironman and Captain America "Tony, I'm not taking sides but you do need to get this in sorted out, you can't just-" He winced at his poor phrasing

"I can't just what Bruce! My thing with being handed stuff has never affected a mission before and it barely disrupts my life so why can't you guys just leave it! You have known me for literally a month besides Natasha who knew me for a year as a fake person! I invite you into my tower, give you a place to live, a nice comfy bed to sleep on, a cool TV, loads of food and yet you think you can just suddenly change my life and how I live it? I'm Tony Stark God Dammit, I do what I want, when I want with who I want. And right now I want to go to my lab without any of you bothering me!" Tony stormed out of the room and into the elevator "JARVIS lock my lab once I'm in there and put on my ACDC playlist. And throw in some Fall Out Boy just for the sake of it."

Clint sighed and deadpanned "Well that failed epically**." (I never got the phrase deadpanned. Just think about it who invented a dead pan? What does it even mean? I know what it means but still) **

Natasha glared at Steve "Steve have you not learnt anything in your time with Stark, if you want anything from him you have to be sneaky."

Steve looked appalled and scandalised "Oh yeah because being underhanded and sneaky will definitely help his trust issues!"

"Cap's got a point there Natasha." Bruce sided with Steve

Natasha didn't want to admit defeat but she couldn't deny that her usual methods might actually just push Stark further away "Okay fine but you know Stark can avoid this for weeks maybe even months before we even start to wear him down."

Bruce held out his hand as if to cut her off but she'd already stopped speaking "We are not wearing him down. We are helping him trust us, there's a difference."

Clint smirked slightly "A Stark difference." The others looked at him eyebrows raised and serious faces "Okay it was a lame joke." Then he mumbled to himself "Tough crowd."

**A/N: Sorry it's so short but I need to catch up with school I'm slipping. **


	3. NOT A CHAPTER SORRY

**A/N: I just wanna say a few thanks to a few people because your reviews really make my day:**

**Thank you to Travellerofadifferentpath for reviewing I'm glad someone thinks Clint's jokes are funny!**

**MarburyBlur Thanks for explaining that deadpanned thing and thanks for reviewing. And you're absolutely right the Avengers are being stupid it won't affect missions. They haven't known Tony long and they don't just realise that although something that would make their lives increasingly difficult and exasperating is second nature to Tony by now. I mean Tony lives with the arc reactor everyday which is sure to cause him a huge amount **

**of pain and he OBVIOUSLY has some PTSD and hasn't even gone for counselling so yeah.**

**Natasha may know how to deal with other people's problems (mostly) but there's only so much SHIELD training can do, she may pry into others lives force out their secrets but in her line of duty she's bound to be messed up in the head.**


	4. I literally have all the big guns!

**A/N: Sorry it's so short and sorry I haven't updated in a while. I guess I'm not as dedicated to this as I am to my other stories but fear not faithful readers I will not abandon this seeing as I'm basing a mini fic series on this and to SexyPinkRanger345 you suggested a deaf Clint fic a while back and I just want to let you know I'm working on it but I wanna finish this first so I can use it as a timeline to anchor the fan-fic-verse.**

He was so angry with the Avengers he just wanted to trash his lab and he loved his lab so that showed how angry he was. He took a few deep breaths and ran his hands through his hair trying to calm down but failed miserably, seriously how did Bruce do this all the time? He ended up punching the wall and regretted his actions immediately as a loud cracking sound reach his ears, he opened his mouth in pain and let out a silent scream while hopping around on the spot cradling his hand to his chest. As he nursed his hand he decided he would call Pepper, he opened his mouth to ask JARVIS to call her but them shut it again remembering his was mad at JARVIS he sighed and got up making his way across the lab and called her manually.

Her face appeared on the screen and without even looking at her phone she said "Tony I don't have time for-" at that moment she had glanced down at her phone and seen his expression "Are you okay?"

"Yeah." He paused "No." Then he sighed agitatedly "I don't know! JARVIS showed the team a few clips from when I was younger to explain why I don't like being handed things because Natasha was snooping and now Steve is thinking of taking me off the field because I'm a liability. I mean me? A liability? Hell, I'm the big gun! I literally have all the big guns!"

"Tony, although I agree you're not a liability you do need to get it sorted out, you can't go through life unable to be handed things by anyone other than me and Rhodey."

"Yes I can, I've done it so far no problem."

"Tony-" Someone called her from the background and she sighed "I'm sorry Tony I have to go, I'm late for my meeting."

"Okay bye Pep. Love you." She hung up without replying and he sighed slumping into a seat. He mumbled sarcastically to himself "Great, just great. Thanks Pepper you helped so much." Then he felt bad because he knew Pepper was busy, heck the only reason she wasn't here was because he wasn't there at the meeting like he should be.

Tony looked around his lab and then sighed for once he didn't feel like working on the suits, or fixing the toaster Thor had broken yet again or designing new arrows for Clint or stretchy clothes for Bruce or guns for Natasha or battle proof cloaks for Thor. He just wanted to sit there for a while, so he did. He pulled the lever underneath the chair and the back lowered he then sat back and closed his eyes falling asleep surprisingly quickly especially comparing to usual when sleep came fitfully and in small dosages due to the nightmares that plagued him.

**A/N: Again sorry it's so short! Any suggestions for this or any of my other fics just PM them or put them in the reviews!**


	5. This isn't over

**A/N:Okay so I got a review from wolftattoo saying Tony should kick them out of his house and at first I was like pft he can't just kick them out. But then I realised he CAN kick them out, it's his tower and they've only been there a month (according to what I've written in the past) also Lighting Sparks said Tony should get his revenge so that's going to come up NEXT chapter.**

**Read the footer A/N please.**

Tony woke with a start an hour later and he looked around bewildered. He realised the toaster he was supposed to have fixed by now had just exploded and had started a small fire. Tony leapt up and grabbed a fire extinguisher aiming the nozzle and dowsing the flames in white foam, once he was sure the fire was out he sat back down and looked around wondering what he should do now that he was awake again "JARVIS," He started before he remembered he was mad at JARVIS then decided it didn't matter "What are the Avengers up to? Get up a live feed and don't tell them I'm watching."

THE VIDEO:

"I don't know guys." Bruce said slightly hesitantly

Clint asked "What don't you know?"

"I mean I don't know that we should push Stark on this. He obviously doesn't want us to."

Natasha leaned forward to make her case "Stark needs help, he's suffering he just doesn't know it."

Bruce frowned "Well if he doesn't know it what's the problem?"

Steve replied "He's your best friend isn't he? You should want to help him."

"I do! I just don't think THIS," he gestured to everyone "Is helping him in the slightest. As his so called best friend I think I know when to push things and when to leave them. And maybe in the future we can try again but for now I think we should leave it. "

"You think? Well I know we shouldn't." Natasha spoke professionally as if this were a SHIELD case "now either you're with us or against us."

"What happens if I'm against you?"

"You leave this meeting and you don't tell Tony." Clint decided the rules quickly

"Whatever happened to 'Oh we won't be underhanded and sneaky'?" Bruce asked standing up

Natasha reasoned "I told you the only way to deal with Stark is with manipulation. He doesn't respond well to confrontation."

Bruce shook his head angrily "You guys are treating this like a SHIELD case. Like he's some problem you can just solve. I'm against you and I WILL be telling Tony."

Natasha stood up "If you tell Tony, he won't trust us."

"With good reason."

"If he doesn't trust us, his trust issues get worse. If you want to help Tony don't tell him otherwise his condition deteriorating will be your fault."

Bruce and Natasha had a silent standoff, she didn't even flinch as his eyes glowed bright green and a green colour tinted his face. He pursed his lips and stormed away "This isn't over Natasha."

**END OF VIDEO**

**A/N: Thank you for reading this**

**I have a bit more but it's really, really rough so I'm going to smooth it over and until then I'll just post this as make up for all my chapters being short. Also I'm in the middle of end of yr tests (Even though it's only the second term of school)**

**Thanks to The Shadow Keeper, Cassius 10, Storm Etienne, Marburyblur, Travellerofadifferentpath, Ronniefranco8, Dominofalling, Wolftatto, Lighting Sparks, Zoxi2, Guest (who probably won't see this) and SexyPinkRanger345 for reviewing a few of you even reviewed multiple times so thanks guys!**


	6. Slapped by Cap

**A/N: I AM SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING! I'll explain down there (Arrow pointing downwards)**

**Guys I have an idea for Clintasha to still happen! As you all know in Marvel, everyone's parents are dead literally so here's my idea. Clint's kid's mum dies so they no longer have a mum and then Clint and Natasha get together and then CLINTASHA!**

A few hours later Bruce came down to the lab "There's pizza upstairs."

"I'm busy right now."

"Do you want me to bring it down?"

"Nah I'm not hungry right now."

Bruce paused and stood awkwardly by the door "Tony...?"

"Yeah Big Green?"

"..." he sighed "Just... watch your step around the others."

Of course Tony knew exactly what he was talking about but he had to play dumb "What do you mean?"

He grimaced and scanned the air vents for signs of Clint "Just don't always trust those around you."

Tony snorted "I don't. Isn't that what got us into this mess in the first place?" he put down the power tool that was in his hands "You know what, maybe I will go grab some pizza. Is it pepperoni?"

Bruce smiled "You betcha."

The two scientists walked up to the living room and were greeted by the others. Natasha nodded while Hawkeye and Steve said "Hi.".

"Sup Capsicle, Katniss, Natashalie." he sat down with a cup of coffee that JARVIS had brewed while getting out his phone and checking his messages with a well practiced ease. 

Natasha sent a stealth glance over to Steve and Clint who both caught on to what she was going to do. 

**LINE BREAK (I know, I know. I suddenly just cut out a huge argument that might be a monumental moment in the story but I can't think of anything to go here! This part right here is the reason I haven't updated since March so I decided I couldn't keep you waiting any longer and I need to get this done. Maybe if I have an idea later that fits I'll do a flashback scene but at the moment I'm fresh out of ideas.**

Steve slapped Tony across the face and everything fell silent. Now don't get me wrong Tony's been slapped by a billion girls who he slept with and never called again and a couple of guys who's girlfriends he's slept with but that was completely different from getting slapped by Captain America. The side of Tony's face exploded in pain and the blood rushed to his cheek. Immediately Steve started spluttering out an apology "Oh my gosh Tony I'm so sorry I just-"

He was interrupted by Tony's abrupt "Get out."

"What?"

"I said get out."

"Tony you can't just-"

"I can't just what Rogers? This is _MY_ tower and I'll do what I want."

"But Stark-"

"JARVIS!" The Mark 28 came out of nowhere and lifted Steve over its shoulder then flew out the window and dumped on the ground before returning to Tony's side.

The Avengers stood awkwardly to the side unsure what to do they kept glancing at each other but hadn't spoken at all.

"So do you guys want to walk out or does JARVIS have to escort you out too?" The three looked at each other before slowly trudging out, Natasha first then Clint and Bruce. "Your bags will arrive on the Helicarrier sometime tomorrow. Oh and Bruce." the mild mannered scientist turned around "You stay here."

Bruce looked a little shocked "uuum what?"

"Unless you _want_ to leave, you can stay here."

"Really? Uuum thanks Tony."

"Well anything for my so called best friend." Even though he was talking to Bruce he looked at Natasha and Clint when he said it

Natasha swore under her breath "You heard."

"Word of advice, if you wanted to talk about me behind my back go somewhere without cameras. Or at least outside of the Tower. I mean that's just common sense."

Clint turned to Tony "Stark maybe we can talk about this."

"Nope. I'll see you on missions and briefings. Nothing more, nothing less."

Natasha stopped in her tracks and turned around "Actually we won't."

Tony questioned "what?"

"On paper, you're not an Avenger. My review of you last year made sure of that. Fury doesn't have to call you, you don't have to come."

"You know Natashalie, if you're trying to make me forgive you you're kind of going in the direction."

Natasha sent him an I-don't-give-a-damn look and sauntered out of the room followed by Clint. The two assassins clad in black and armed with guns (and Clint's bow and arrows) stepped into the elevator and pressed the button for the ground floor. As they got out they got a few stares from the people waiting in reception and the receptionists themselves. The Avengers had their own back entrance so it wasn't often two of them would walk through the front lobby.

As they left the air conditioned waiting area and entered the crowded streets of New York they saw Captain America, in full uniform fuming outside completly unsure what to do and unable to contact shield, the public had parted around him a few stopping to take pictures and post them on Instagram or Twitter. Natasha called out to him "Steve!" and he looked up at them as they made their way towards him.

When they reached him Steve asked "He kicked you guys out too?"

Clint nodded "Yeah."

"What happened to Bruce?"

Clint grimaced "he heard us talking about him before and because Bruce stuck up for him and I think he might have told him as well so Tony let him stay."

Natasha joined Cap in crossing his arms "Did we make everything worse?"

Steve dropped his head "I think so."

Clint looped his arm through his bow "He doesn't trust us. I mean he never trusted us but now he trusts us even less."

Steve, Natasha and Clint sighed and they were silent for ten seconds until Cap broke the silence "hey, can one of you call SHIELD to pick us up? I left my SHIELD Comm in the tower...sugar! I left my shield in there as well!"

Natasha got out her communicator "Don't worry Cap, Tony said he'd drop our stuff off at the helicarrier tomorrow." Then she spoke into her com "This is Agent Romanoff Codename Black Widow requesting pick up for three for direct passage to the Helicarrier. We are outside Stark tower."

A slightly muffled female voice came through the speakers "This is Quinjet 8 piloted by Agent May. Your request has been granted coming for pick up now. ETA is T minus 90 seconds."

Clint looked shocked "Is that the Calvary?"

Natasha slapped him upside the head "You know May doesn't like that name."

"Damn right I don't. Barton when you get on my jet I'm slapping you." May replied humourlessly

Clint whined "But Nat already hit me!"

"Well Natasha isn't me." There was a pause over the radio "T minus 75 seconds."

Clint grinned "great we have a minute I'm going to go take selfies with fans!" and he sauntered out of the empty patch of street that the crowd had made. As soon as people heard that Hawkeye was taking selfies the crowd surged forward holding their pones up and yelling "Okay form an orderly line starting from here." He pointed at the ground in front of him "Keep in mind I only have a minute so the less hassle the more photos." Surprisingly the crowd managed to get into a neat queue in a matter of seconds and Clint started systematically taking selfies.

Steve looked at Natasha and shrugged. Natasha looked at Steve and deadpanned "no."

"C'mon Nat!"

She took a deep breath "fine. Hey everybody me and Captain America are doing selfies too. Get into a line though, I don't do unruly crowds."

A few people from the back of Hawkeye's queue left to join the newer shorter line and the people who already had pictures with Hawkeye also joined the new queue. Steve was smiling in all of them, Natasha was not. To Cap's embarrassment a few brave fans gave him a peck on the cheek making him blush and causing Black Widow to give him a very faint barely visible side smile.

"T minus 10 seconds."

Nat shouted to Clint "We have ten seconds."

Clint returned the phone he had been using and waved goodbye to the crowd. The three heroes and the large crowd looked up wanting to see the Quinjet.

"T minus 5 seconds."

The crowd counted down "FIVE! FOUR! THREE! TWO! ONE! ZERO!"

As they reached zero a Quinjet hovered above them and a door on the base opened causing a slope to descend. The slope stopped three quarters of a metre above the ground so they had to lift their legs up high to get on. As soon as the three of them were standing on the slope it started to close, Clint and Steve waved goodbye to the crowd while black Widow stood their stoically and started walking up the slope. When the doors finally closed they all sat down. True to her word Agent Melinda May slapped Clint then she asked "So why do you guys need an unscheduled ride to the helicarrier?"

Clint pouted "Tony kicked us out of the tower."

May did a double take "what? Why?"

Natasha glared at the super soldier "Steve slapped him across the face."

May sounded even more shocked "WAIT WHAT!?"

Steve leapt to his own defence "Hey it wasn't just that! You two and your secrets and your manipulative behaviour are what caused him to kick us out."

"Hey don't blame me Captain Slappers! You're the load that broke the camel's back!" Cried Clint

Natasha shrugged "Let's face it Cap, the Avengers and SHIELD have been riding Stark for as long as he's been Iron Man. I mean on paper he's not even in the Avengers Initiate."

Steve looked shocked "Tony's not an Avengers?!"

Natasha pulled a face "I went undercover at his company last year. Gave him a bad review, I believe I said he was volatile, narcissistic and didn't play well with others."

"and now?"

"Now what?"

Steve rephrased "What do you think about him now?"

Black Widow paused for a moment before answering "He's still volatile, narcissistic and he still doesn't play well with others. But he's also one of the smartest, kindest, nicest people I know. He just doesn't know how to show it. It's why he let us stay at Stark tower, Fury didn't force him he had a chose."

Clint sighed "And we caused him to kick us out."

Agent May whistled as if impressed "Wow, you guys must have been really bad housemates."

Clint and Steve exchanged mildly guilty looks whilst Natasha scoffed "Please May, we were trying to help him! Even Jarvis was on our side."

Melinda May raised an eyebrow but kept her eyes fixed on the sky and her mouth zipped shut.

**A/N: I felt like writing Aunt May instead of Agent or Melinda just to see if anyone would notice but then I decided not to...**

**But about Age of Ultron... SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS I love Clintasha and I'm going down with that ship, Tony was right his wife and kids are just agents, if Natasha can start that early so can those kids. AND PIETRO MY BABY NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!**


End file.
